This is a story of two lovers that loves each other so much that they argue so much about every little thing. This relationship is new with a new life to come. They do not know what to do at this point because hormones are all over the place. Friction on friction, heat on heat as temperatures rise in conversations that concerns them. One does all they can to resolve this problem, but others just does not want to understand the magnitude of the situation. Complaint after complaint that gets nowhere. Tears of heart brake, sadness, sleepless nights awake until dawn. What caused all of this turmoil? Where is the trust that was once there? Where is the softness of the voices that was speaking once with love and care? Where is the reasoning between the two that this concerns?
Can this be fixed before the new life arrives? Will things get better? Will they remain the same? Will love walk in again, or will it stay far away, distant?
Once upon a time, there were two countries that met and fell in love. They did everything together once they got together in one place to live together always. Light and brown they were, but that didn’t matter to them…they loved each other. As their love grew they began to blossom into happiness, never apart, holding hands, making love, and creating new life. How wonderful it all was; fresh and new for them. Distance knew no place in their relationship until she went home to her mother and father. Oh, how happy her mother was to see her daughter walk through the doors of the home where she once lived with her parents, but she was not alone, a different person was with her. As she saw her daughter for the first time in a long time, she held her so tight as if she was never going to see her again. She was smiling to the point of crying happy tears. This was a special occasion because it was Father’s Day. She introduced the person that was with her as her boyfriend. They sat at the table and ate the food that was prepared by her mother. She was glowing like she had this news that she wanted to share. Her mother asked her if she was pregnant and she said yes; her mother told her and her boyfriend to get up and go tell her father about it, but to no avail he already knew.
Her daughter decided to stay home. He wanted to stay with her but he could not because they were not married. He did not want to leave her, but he had no other choice. After it was all said and done, it was time for him to go home. She was upset because they could not be together, but she was fine later on. They talked on the phone and texted each other until she went to sleep. Her mother went to work the next day, when she came home, it was not a pretty sight, it was not welcoming, and it was not quiet as usual; there was an argument going on that she was completely unaware of. She did not know what was going on. It hurt her heart to see her daughter and her father speaking to one another like that. It brought tears to her eyes. She spoke her peace and it was all settled. Their daughter remained at her parents house.
Now that everything is fine between them, her boyfriend was being jealous, childish, and not understanding of what she needed from him. All she wanted was some space just to think and realize that her life was about to change for the better, she was bringing a new life into the world. She was about to be a mother for the first time in her life, and he was about to be a father for the first time in his life. It was going to be wonderful. He just could not get himself together to do the things that he was to do as a man for his new family. There was a lot of stress put on her from him with all of the excuses that he had about taking care of his responsibilities as a father and a future husband to her. Her mother and father tried talking to him, but it was a waste of time, he just would not listen to anyone.
False accusations were made to her from him that really made her mad, so she cut him off for a while. Her mother preached to him about the things that he needed to do to get his life right, but that just went through one ear and out of the other. Things between them began to worsen as the days turned into nights. She ate, slept and did what she had to do to get through the day. When she thought about him, she would call or text him just to talk about their relationship and what they wanted for their future. Her mother was very happy for her, but she could sense that something was just wrong about it all, she could see that her daughter was always stressed out because of something he said. He did not realize that all of the stress he was causing her would cause her to miscarry their baby. Time ticked on as she began looking for a job, but yet and still he did not have a job to support her and their soon to come child. She was happy being with her parents, but she still was upset because of the situation with her boyfriend not trying hard enough to find a job and keep it to save money for them. Her mother talked to her and told her that everything would be alright. She told her daughter to pray and to let God handle the rest. She told her not to worry because it was not good for her. Her father talked to her about the things that mattered in life. About the things that a man does for his family to make a relationship work. About how there are no perfect relationships. She understood everything that was told to her. She has grew up a lot, and has become more respectful to her parents.
A month has passed and the reality of becoming a mother has set in. Her mother told her stories of what she went through when she was carrying them. She told her how happy she was as a new mother although she still had to go to school through it all with he first child. She told her about how it changed her life, and how she was just a child herself when she got pregnant for the first time. She told her about the good times and the bad times also. She wanted her to understand that everyday was not going to be roses, but sometimes there would be thorns, I mean that there would be not so good days.
As new life began to grow inside of her, her mother was so happy to be a new grandmother. She had thought about all of the things that she was going to do when the baby arrived. She was thinking about how she was going to dress the baby up real pretty. How she was going to spend time with her grandchild. She had high hopes of joy and happiness to share with her first grandchild. Some how she looked at life a bit differently. She had something to look forward to everyday. Day after day depression began to rob her daughter of her happiness because of he way her boyfriend was acting. He just did not understand that she needed her space so she could rest and relax so she could be happy. He did not want to to take no for an answer. He wanted to keep he up all night talking just because he was lonely and could not sleep without her, and because he was fighting his demons of his past. She lost rest and became tired due to the constant stress. Arguments arose to the point that she had her mother talk to him for her to get him to understand where she was coming from, but that did not work; she wasted her time talking to someone that still has a child’s mind, that just did not want to do what he knew he should have been doing. She told him that if he did not get saved and give his life to the Lord he could not be with her. She also told him that he needed to get himself together, but still he did not listen.
Talking just did not help. When her mother came home from work, her daughter opened the door for her. They both had to use the bathroom, but her daughter went before she did, and that is when she saw the blood as she wiped. She asked her mother was that normal and she told her no. Her mother told her that she was going to have to go to the hospital. She went and told her husband that they were going to have to take their daughter to the hospital immediately because she was bleeding. When they arrived to the hospital and got her checked in, it took a long time to see her, so she called 911 and told them what was going on and they called, and then they called her back. Only one of us could go with her, so her mother went and her father went back home and waited for her to call him when it was all said and done. As we arrived into the room, the nurse gave her a gown to put on and they gave her some medication for pain after they drew blood to get her blood type.
They waited for a while for the technician to come in and do a sonogram to check to see if there was a heartbeat for her baby, and to check her cervix, it was fine, but there was not a heartbeat for her baby. Our daughter had started miscarrying her baby. Tears of sadness began to stream down our faces. The hurt they felt was deep as if someone came and ripped their hearts out. She asked her mother to call her boyfriend to let him know; she did. The phone rang and he answered. Her mother told him what had happened to their baby; he began to cry from the news that he had heard. Her mother explained everything to him, and she talked to him about it. Her mother texted her father and told him what happened and why she was bleeding, at that point they were ready to go. They waited to be released. That was the beginning of the worst days of her life. After it was all said and done they went home.
As they walked into the house, their daughter went to the bathroom with her mother to use the bathroom, that is where she almost fainted. Her mother took her and put her in the bed. She sat up with her until she ate her food that they gave her at the hospital, then she went to sleep. Her mother went to bed to get a little rest because she had to go to work the next day.
As her alarm went off she got up and got ready to go to work as usual. Later on that evening at 5:26, she called her husband and talked to him, and he put their daughter on the phone, she told her mother that she was hurting very bad, so she told her that she was on her way home. She told her coworker and she left. She walked as fast as she could. She was not thinking about how swollen her feet were, she was just trying to get home to her daughter to see what the problem was. When she arrived home, her daughter was going into labor. She called the ambulance. The dispatcher stayed on the phone with her until they arrived there, then she hung up the phone. They had her to walk out to the ambulance to get on the bed because they could not get the bed into the house; her mother went out with her and sat on the ambulance with her to give them the information that they needed from the previous hospital visit. She could not ride with her daughter because of the changes that had been made because of COVID-19. She was not considered a minor because she was pregnant, so her parents had to drive up to the hospital. After they arrived to the second hospital, only one parent could go in, and because her mother had been tested for COVID-19 she was allowed to go in with her daughter. The paramedic talked to the doctors and the nurses for her mother so she could go in with her when they called her back. She thanked the paramedic for all that he had done for her and her daughter. It was not long after the paperwork was done that they called her to be weighed so they could get her vital signs. They waited back out in they lobby until the room was ready for her. We were soon called and taken into the room where the sonogram was done, more blood was taken from the IV. that was put into her arm on the ambulance to get her blood type. She was in so much pain. They gave her some medication to ease the pain and to help her sleep. The technician came in and done the sonogram to check her and to see if there was a heartbeat, but her mother told the technician that the baby did not have a heartbeat. She had to take pictures that had to be read and confirmed. Her mother held her hand as it was going on, but her daughter could not be still, so she had to stop the procedure. She laid there on the bed and went to sleep for a while as the technician did what she had to do. More medication was given to her to help ease the pain. The technician had to take one last picture and check for a heartbeat again, and that is when her mother thought that she heard a heartbeat, but it was because her daughter moved, but when her mother saw the flatline go across the monitor, she knew for sure that the baby was gone; all she could do was breakdown. After that was over, the nurse came and told the technician that her room was ready, room 21. They stayed there until they were discharged. Her mother called her dad and texted him to let him know they were ready to go. Her brother called to let their mother know that he had made it home while they were waiting to be released, and he went and bought all of them something to eat. After they arrived home, she wanted to lie down and go to sleep. Her brother helped their mother with what she needed. Her mother tucked her in and sat with her for a while as she and their son talked. She got up and ate her salad and watched television until she heard her daughter call for her. When she made it in the room, her daughter had given birth in her bed. Her mother had not ever saw so much blood before. Her mother helped her up to get cleaned up. She was strong and brave through it all. She cleaned up her daughter, and she cleaned up the death that was before her eyes, her first grandchild that she would never get to see grow up, hold, sing to, laugh with, play with, talk with, teach how to drive, to see graduate school and college, to buy things for…she had to see all of that with their daughter, her son did what he could, but her father stayed in the living room until it was all cleaned up. Her mother blessed the remains of their daughters baby and gave their grandchild back to the Lord. They all said their goodbyes to the little fetus as her grandmother took her away.
Her daughter got in the shower to clean herself up. After she returned from showering she dried off, got dressed and came into the living room. She sat on the couch to watch television when all of a sudden she felt a pain. She got up and used the bathroom; there was her baby’s heart, the last thing to discard itself from her body. Her mother saw the heart of her daughter’s baby as she held it in her hand for the first and last time in her life.
As the heart was discarded, it was all over, completely over. The life that once was alive had returned home to heaven to be with the Lord. Even though it was twelve weeks that the baby lived, it was the best twelve weeks of my life, just knowing that I will get to see my first grandchild again in heaven is truly a blessing. We may not ever know why He took her away, but He knew what was best for the baby.
Life was given, and life was taken. Remembering what joy our baby brought will always be in our hearts. Yes, tears will always be shed when we think about our grandchild. Every time I step in our daughters room, I will remember that night. That is something that will never forget. I will always love our Little bit, that is the nickname I gave our grandbaby. May she rest in peace in the arms of Jesus Christ.
www.bible.com/1/psa.103.13.kjv
Food for the Soul 